Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Bio vs Step Parents | Step Talk

Background: During the holidays DH and I took some time off of work and took a road trip. We were within an hour of my BD's house so of course I wanted to stop for a visit since I only see her a few times a year. Dh agreed and while we were visiting the kids ask when we had to head back home and DH spoke up and said tomorrow. We were only staying one afternoon and the night and leaving the next morning.

I was very upset that DH would not stay another day but I did not let it show to DH or my BD and family. DH made up a stupid excuse for why he had to get home so soon and of course my kids didn't argue with him but they realized I am sure that it was just that ~ an excuse.

All the way home and for the next few days all I could think was if DH was their Bio-father he would not have wanted to leave so soon. I felt the pain of a "blended" family worse than I have ever felt it.

I was sad. I was disappointed. I was depressed. I realized that no matter how much DH likes my children he will never feel about them like I do.

DH asked me if I was alright because I didn't speak to him for a couple days only if necessary. My mind was consumed with the choice I made, the hurt I was feeling and the thought that I wish my bio's father hadn't been such an idiot.

DH likes my kids but he doesn't now or maybe never will feel the NEED to spend time with them every chance he gets. DH will probably never miss my bio's like I do. DH will never feel the need to cry when we part like I do.

Has anyone else ever had this experience?

Source: http://www.steptalk.org/node/106084

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